Couples Therapy

Relational psychotherapy for romantic and life partners

Couples Therapy

Relational psychotherapy for romantic and life partners

Couples Therapy

Relational psychotherapy for romantic and life partners

Overview

Most couples know how to talk; the problem is what happens to them when they try. You might find yourselves having the same argument for the tenth time, wondering why a small comment spiraled into a weekend of silence. A relational psychoanalytic approach doesn't offer a "to-do" list of better habits. Instead, it looks at the unconscious patterns and emotional histories that each person brings into the room. We attend not only to what you say to one another, but to what lives beneath the words—the longings, fears, and unspoken stories that shape your dynamic.

Overview

Most couples know how to talk; the problem is what happens to them when they try. You might find yourselves having the same argument for the tenth time, wondering why a small comment spiraled into a weekend of silence. A relational psychoanalytic approach doesn't offer a "to-do" list of better habits. Instead, it looks at the unconscious patterns and emotional histories that each person brings into the room. We attend not only to what you say to one another, but to what lives beneath the words—the longings, fears, and unspoken stories that shape your dynamic.

How We Work Together

In relational therapy, we recognize that when two people come together, they create something new—a unique psychological field that belongs to neither person alone. This shared space is where your dynamic lives. By looking at this space together, we can explore: • The Unspoken Scripts: We all carry "blueprints" from our earliest relationships. Often, we unconsciously "recruit" our partners to play a role in a story we've been living our whole lives. Naming these scripts allows us to choose differently. • Projective Identification: Sometimes we "deposit" our own difficult feelings—like shame or fear—into our partner. When they act those feelings out, it confirms our worst fears. Together, we untangle who owns which feeling and what each of you is being asked to carry. • The "Unthought Known": These are things you feel deeply but haven't yet been able to put into words. We work to name these experiences so they no longer have silent power over your reactions.

How We Work Together

In relational therapy, we recognize that when two people come together, they create something new—a unique psychological field that belongs to neither person alone. This shared space is where your dynamic lives. By looking at this space together, we can explore: • The Unspoken Scripts: We all carry "blueprints" from our earliest relationships. Often, we unconsciously "recruit" our partners to play a role in a story we've been living our whole lives. Naming these scripts allows us to choose differently. • Projective Identification: Sometimes we "deposit" our own difficult feelings—like shame or fear—into our partner. When they act those feelings out, it confirms our worst fears. Together, we untangle who owns which feeling and what each of you is being asked to carry. • The "Unthought Known": These are things you feel deeply but haven't yet been able to put into words. We work to name these experiences so they no longer have silent power over your reactions.

Sessions

I typically see couples together. Occasionally, based on clinical need, I may meet individually with each partner to better understand their unique perspective and history. These individual sessions are always held within the context of our shared work as a couple. Sessions are typically 80 minutes, providing the time needed to slow down, track relational patterns, and attend to what unfolds between partners in the room.

Sessions

I typically see couples together. Occasionally, based on clinical need, I may meet individually with each partner to better understand their unique perspective and history. These individual sessions are always held within the context of our shared work as a couple. Sessions are typically 80 minutes, providing the time needed to slow down, track relational patterns, and attend to what unfolds between partners in the room.

The Result

The goal isn't a relationship without conflict. It is a relationship where you are both fully seen, where "high masking" is no longer necessary, and where you have the clarity to move forward with a shared sense of purpose. Change becomes possible not through effort alone, but through the experience of being met—and meeting one another—in new ways.

The Result

The goal isn't a relationship without conflict. It is a relationship where you are both fully seen, where "high masking" is no longer necessary, and where you have the clarity to move forward with a shared sense of purpose. Change becomes possible not through effort alone, but through the experience of being met—and meeting one another—in new ways.

The Result

The goal isn't a relationship without conflict. It is a relationship where you are both fully seen, where "high masking" is no longer necessary, and where you have the clarity to move forward with a shared sense of purpose. Change becomes possible not through effort alone, but through the experience of being met—and meeting one another—in new ways.